21 Days To Form a Habit, (Absolute Lie)

I see this comment made all the time, “it takes 21 days to form a habit.” All I can wonder is whether or not the people who make statements like that have ever actually formed a conscious habit for themselves. Let me explain why I say this

Firstly, we need to look at why habits are hard to form. And I have come to realise that habits are hard to form because they work in opposition to other habits that we have already formed.

Think about it… if a habit was as easy as just deciding today to form a new habit from this day forth, then as easy as that, a new habit is born. This would cause a serious problem, because as easy as it would be to form a new habit, that’s how easy it would be to break the old one that worked in opposition to the new one.

For example, if you decided one day that you were going to brush your teeth every morning first thing as you wake up, and that’s it, from that day forward you would brush your teeth every morning without even thinking about it? What would happen if you decided after a year (when you had forgotten about your “first thing in the morning teeth brushing idea,”) to shower straight after you woke up. Well because forming a new habit like showering would be very easy, the old habit of first brushing your teeth would be instantly broken. That would be a problem.

The difficulty of forming a habit depends on two things, is it in opposition to another earlier formed habit? If it is (and it always is), the next question is, how deeply engrained is the old habit? The depth of an old habit depends on how long you have been doing it for.

So does a habit take 21 days to form? Well below I have given two examples of habits, you tell me which one would be harder to form.

-         Yesterday I decided to brush my teeth every morning, but today I decided it would be better to shower first.

-          I have been brushing my teeth first thing in the morning for 50 years, a few weeks ago I decided to shower first, but I keep forgetting out of force of habit.

There is another problem with the 21 day habit idea, and that is, it doesn’t take into account Mr Habits evil twin, Mr Addiction.

Addiction is similar to a habit, except that it alters the chemistry of the brain. Whether we brush our first or shower first doesn’t alter the brains chemistry. It’s just a habit. Whereas heroin, nicotine, caffeine and alcohol do alter the brains chemistry, and that changes everything.

If you decided to abstain from drinking milk or if you decide to abstain from your heroine addiction is a completely different ball game